The Emotional Trampoline of Creative Process

Although it causes us to bicker, fume, and frown to no end- Joel and I really do work well together when it comes to designing dreams.

For instance, yesterday evening we began to tackle how we want to run electrical in the two large, beautiful rooms downstairs- which further entailed tackling what those rooms might eventually morph into and how best to accommodate such things with said plans. How should the light fall? What kind of light should we use? How much electrical should we bring over? How do you differentiate different space with light? Where should the switches go? Every large project has a web of nuances that seems quite simple until you begin to put it on paper. Then, it becomes an all-out, certified, tasty creative mess.

I think we like it that way. One of us will draw something on paper. The other one will sit and think and say, "We'll this is nice but what about this?" and scribble all over the drawing. Then the other will say, "I like where you're going, but, I think the water hook ups are actually over here." "Are you sure?" Let's go check." And we'll run up and downstairs, scribbling and speaking in half sentences become more unintelligible to any onlookers as the process wears on. Sometimes, we'll begin to fight. I accusing him of being impractical and him accusing me of wanting to do something that will no longer suit our needs in x number of years. But, after a good meal or a couple of drinks, it all works out in the end.

No, it doesn't just work out. It works out to be something so much better than either of us could have done alone.

For this wedding, we two have so much more creative capacity than the barrage of websites and resources that have avalanched to my inbox in the last 48 hours. While I am overwhelmed by the amount of love that pours over such excited helpfulness. I wasn't expecting it at all! But being independent to a fault- and getting married to someone who is the same- I do hope you not think it rude when I say that it just isn't the best way to go about this.

I have done my fair share of reading about weddingness online and in-print to know what needs to be on an invitation, the top 47 places to buy a dress online, the top 16 ways to make your own party favors, the top 31 ways to save money on your wedding that you had never thought of before, etc.

I really, really love everyone's enthusiasm- but our best bet for making this truly an occasion that expresses what we're celebrating uniquely is not copying someone else brilliant tradition-bucking wedding ideas or picking out one of ten options on a particular website. Our absolute best resource for creative spark and awesome outcome is each other.

Joel and me- the "and" that falls between us when we work on a project we love. Not the witty authors of The Knot, Offbeatbride, or any other of those wonderfully creative, amusing, inspiring, fantastically designed, mind blowing blogs. Not anyone else's wedding- whether they be related or some gorgeous stranger in cyberland. And, possibly, maybe, not even what you may believe to be the best way for Joel and I to truly express our love and commitment for each other during said wedding- traditional or otherwise.

We will need your help.

I imagine I will be on the phone often with all of my close family, family-to-be, and friends seeking advice and support throughout this process. But, when I ask for your help, I'll be asking for you and your personal heart and mind creative ingenuity- not what you osmosed from your own wedding or blog reading- because if I love you enough to ask you to be involved in this, I'm going to want you. For real you. You truly.

Joel and I look forward to sharing the first phase of exciting, creative clash together. And I personally really look forward to working with Joel on a "project" that will bond the two of us into- among other things- creative partners forever.

Until then, the best thing you can give us is an open heart and a willing hand.

We love you!